The Best Loser

Dear Diary,

Today I decided to not participate in the triathlon I signed up for. My friend still did it, but I decided to not do it because it was too competitive. They gave awards out to the highest performing athletes and I thought it was really discriminatory towards the people who trained for a month and decided to wing it when the starting bell rang at the race. If anything, I didn't want to go because I felt like all the hard work and discipline was abusive and intrusive on my self love. I don't want to work that hard for anything. I should just be awarded for even thinking of doing it in the first place -- you know, Diary, the race!

Well.. turns out I DID get an award! The organizers of the triathlon came to my house and presented me with the most AESTHETICALLY PLEASING award that said "You tried, your intentions were in the right place. You go girl!" I love it so much. I think everyone who signed up for the race should have gotten one, even if they were the last people to pass the finish line. ESPECIALLY if they didn't train for it, because that is just brave! The people who work extremely hard to accomplish silly goals shouldn't be rewarded -- it should be the people who have never worked on the thing they are trying to accomplish. Now that takes balls.

This reminds me of that one time I lost a spelling bee in 5th grade, and I didn't even prepare for it because I didn't care enough and it wasn't a priority, and I STILL won an award. See Diary, you don't have to work for anything. It just comes to you.

I love not being the best at anything, because in that way, you are the BRAVEST with everything.
TOOTLES,

Ashley Tisdale


(In case you were wondering where this journal entry was inspired by, watch this video!)