The form of the song is slightly erratic, but not on accident. Stevens jumps from one stage in his life to another in each stanza, all the while incorporating lines about the love he feels for Eugene. It doesn’t matter if he’s describing his own youth, during which he likely did not love or even know Eugene. He still explains his romantic feelings for Eugene as if they have existed all of Stevens’ life:
Since I was old enough to speak I’ve said it with alarm
Some part of me was lost in your sleeve
Where you hid your cigarettes
No I’ll never forget
I just want to be near you
The way Stevens effortlessly bends his personal timeline within the song illustrates the ethereal qualities of love, a ghostliness paralleled in his vocals and guitar-picking. Stevens’ love for Eugene transcends time; it has existed in Stevens since his own birth.
The repetition in the last line of each verse makes Stevens’ mourning even more poignant. From “I just wanted to be near you” to “And now I want to be near you,” “I just want to be near you,” and “Now I want to be near you,” Stevens nearly brings the listener to tears with his yearning for Eugene’s company.
We don’t even know that Eugene is dead until the second-to-last verse, at which point Stevens stops celebrating his past with Eugene and begins lamenting the future: “For the rest of my life, admitting the best is behind me...What’s the point of singing songs / If they’ll never even hear you?” Even just typing out those words, I have the urge to cry. Stevens’ muse is dead, and Stevens will continue living knowing he will never encounter another love or inspiration like Eugene.
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